Bible Verse

Beg as loud as you can for good common sense. Proverbs 2:3

Friday, March 28, 2014

What’s the Deal With Construction Sites?

It really bugs me when a building starts to go up and I have no information as to what said building will be.

Clothing store?  Grocery Store?  Dollar store?  Fast Food?  Bank?

Or will it be the long-awaited, long-rumored Target?

I think it highly unlikely that a Target will locate here.  We live in a rural area with four small towns and countless smaller communities in our county.  We are lucky to have the 3 Wal-Marts.  Or unlucky, depending on how you look at it.

I’ve heard that going to Wal-Mart on Friday night has replaced death as the biggest fear people have. (Just kidding – sort of) 

Along the same lines, I was once caught in a check-out line at Wal-Mart for so long that I thought I had died and gone to hell and that was it – standing in a check-out line at Wal-Mart for eternity.  Pretty scary stuff.

Back to construction sites.  Around here, a new building can be big news.  Instead of talking about the weather, we say to each other “Have you heard about the new store coming in?” and we eagerly share what information we have.

Many times, however, people have the story completely wrong and instead of a shiny, new Target, we end up with another boring bank.  I know banks are necessary and I’m thankful for them, but I think we’ve got enough of them to go around.  Let’s see something new!  Something unique!

You’d think the business whose building was going up would be proud to say, “We are locating here!”  The only people who are proud about it are the people who are financing it and the construction company, whose signs are right out there in front of the building.

A few years ago, I started hearing that we were getting a Publix.  I took the same line of thinking as I do with the current rumors of a Target.  Probably not going to happen.  My mother kept insisting that Guntersville was getting a Publix because the husband of somebody she knows said he was going to work there.  I kept insisting that we didn’t have the traffic, the population, or the income needed for a big store like Publix.

You’ll never guess what happened.  I was wrong.  I know; I couldn’t believe it, either.

Publix is building a store in Guntersville.  I could not figure out what happened.  Our county has tried for years to draw big stores to this area, and the reasons given for not being successful at that were traffic, population and income.

Did we suddenly grow in those three areas while I was not looking?  No, it turns out that we didn’t suddenly live up to their standards, they lowered theirs in that our new Publix will be a smaller version of the standard store.

There was a lot of publicity surrounding all of this, so we pretty well knew what was going in before the land had even been cleared.

David and I have been traveling lately, and I noticed that mystery buildings are being built all over the place, not just here. 

Come on, people!  We’re nosy!  We want to know!

Give us something to talk about other than the weather.  Please?

Friday, March 21, 2014

What’s the Deal With High Chairs?

High chairs drive me nuts.  They are for children.  They are not for adults.  How did this get confused?

I can tell you that the confusion does not lie with short-legged people.  I have nothing against people with long legs, but they are going to have to give the SLP’s (short-legged people) a break in some things.  Especially the old SLP’s.

After 62 years of practically running to keep up with the long legs, I can tell you that being an SLP is hard work.  
In our defense, I would like to say that an SLP’s legs do what the good Lord made them to do: they reach the ground.

So now we come to the high chair with their high table.  I think the first one I ever saw was in Taco Bell.  Kids love ‘em.  Next time you’re in a place with high chairs and tables, watch the kids.  They are attracted to them like ants to a Popsicle stick.  It’s fascinating to watch.

Fortunately, my kids were adults by the time the high chairs and tables made their appearance, therefore I didn’t have to bodily force them off the high chairs so that we could sit at a normal table and their mother’s feet would at least be on the floor.

It’s a little known fact that my feet don’t even reach to the handy-dandy bar placed between two legs of the chair for someone to prop their feet on.  I am left hanging, so to speak, so that when I do hit the linoleum, my feet have gone to sleep and the rest of me is in very real danger of congregating with them on the floor.

There’s always someone who says, “Are you all right?” as I stagger like Dean Martin toward the door.  “Sure,” I say, “just a little tingle in my feet.”

Actually, that’s a lie.  There are no tingles because my feet are completely numb.

And all this just to sit up high?  I don’t get it.

And I’m not going to get it.  I’ve decided to stick with tables and chairs that are the proper height.  I don’t want to be the evening’s entertainment as everyone watches this old SLP try to climb on and then fall off her chair.

Beg as loud as you can for good common sense.
Proverbs 2:3

Friday, March 14, 2014

What’s the Deal With Checking Out?

A few weeks ago, I wrote a post called What’s the Deal With Self Check-outs, which turns out to be one of my most popular posts.

But this time I’m writing about actually standing in the line, patiently waiting for the customer in front of you to finish checking out.

This is what happened to me the other day in a very poorly designed Dollar General.

I had traversed the entire store, looking for this and that, but I was finally ready to check out.  The woman in front of me was in the process of emptying her card onto the counter.  There isn’t room for a conveyer belt, just a counter.  So she finally gets through unloading and moves her cart to the side at the end of the check-out station, the only available space. 
So, thinking that she’ll be paying on the other side of the do-hickey where you slide your credit card like normal places such as Food World and Wal-Mart, I start unloading my cart. 

“Excuse me,” I hear.  Looking up, I am appalled to see that my cart is completely blocking her access to the clerk and the register.  So I quickly apologize and back up.  Right into the cart of the lady behind me.

Good thing I’m amply padded back there or there might have been a multi-cart collision on Isle 2.

So the woman at the check-out in front of me goes through the excruciatingly tedious and time-consuming process of digging through her change purse looking for exactly 18 cents that she can put with a 20 so she can get exactly $7 back in change.  Then she stands there putting her hard-earned money into her billfold.

In the meantime, the clerk starts to scan and bag my stuff.  That would be fine except I didn’t have all my items on the counter because there wasn’t enough room.  Now that I’m still standing back aways so I don’t run over the customer in front of me, I can’t get my remaining things on the counter.  

One reason for that is because there’s merchandise stacked at this end of the counter.  I guess they’re hoping that I’ve developed bad breath while waiting in line and I will pick up a couple of packs of Tic Tacs.

The woman finally gets her change in her purse (Praise God, and I mean that literally) and moves down just enough for me to kind of fling the rest of my stuff onto the counter.  It doesn’t help that I am trying to put a big package of paper towels up there that has a mind of its own and is completely out of control.  Just when I think I’ve flung it far enough, it teeters on the end of the counter and falls back in my cart. 

The clerk, meanwhile, has been scanning and bagging.

Just as the woman in front of me moves completely out of the way and I move forward, the clerk announces my total.  Fortunately, I had already gotten my credit card out and had put it in my pocket.  So I whipped it out, feeling all organized and proud that I’m not holding up the line, to find that this credit card do-hickey is not one that I’m familiar with.  I see the little picture of how you’re supposed to scan it, but my mind has gone completely blank as I turn the card over and over, trying desperately to match the picture.

The clerk, bless her heart, sees that a poor, elderly woman isn’t coping very well with modern technology, so she takes the card out of my hand, turns it the right way, and says, “Here you go, dear.”  Dear?  Did she just call me dear?  Would she say that to a 30-year-old?  Don’t get me started.

Anyway, I was desperate by this time to just get moving, so I smiled and thanked her.

When all of that was done, it was time to put my bags in my cart.  It bugs me that Wal-Mart does not have their clerks put your bags in your cart.  I always do some of it, but it’s a nice touch when the clerk helps.

Don’t look for it at Dollar General.  The way it’s set up, the clerk can’t help you because she’s trapped back there by the counter and bag carousel.  So I pulled a few bags off and then asked if that was all of my order, because it didn’t look like it to me.  She huffed a little, said, “No” like she was disciplining a 2-year-old, and moved the carousel to reveal the rest of my bags.

I choose to believe she was having a bad day, and helping an old person was getting on her last nerve.  Otherwise, I would have some choice words for that young whippersnapper, let me tell you!

With all my bags in my cart, I head for the door and find that it is not an automatic door.  It doesn’t open just because I’m standing there.  So now I have to open the door and either push or pull my cart through a door that doesn’t even open all the way. 

Another young whippersnapper came along (am I the oldest person in this whole store?) and pulled the door open at just the exact moment I no longer needed any help.  


Beg as loud as you can for good common sense.  Proverbs 2:3 CEV

Monday, March 10, 2014

Great Book - Four Cups by Chris Hodges

I want to share this book with you, my favorite reader.

The author takes the four cups of wine used in the celebration of Passover to help us understand God’s ancient promises. As we are guided through these four cups of promise, it is clear that God is working out a plan for each of us that He had from the very beginning.

I liked this book very much. Chris Hodges is a master at explaining things for those of us who aren’t theologians. The four cups are sanctification, deliverance, redemption and praise. We are set apart by sanctification, delivered by shutting the door on the past, redeemed by God’s grace, and learn to praise Him for giving us the means to be totally fulfilled.

I recommend this book for anyone seeking a deeper look into how we fit into God’s plans.

I received a complimentary copy of this book for review purposes from Tyndale House.

Friday, March 7, 2014

What’s the Deal With Random People?

It seems simple enough.  I’m just sitting in my beloved recliner, watching a little something on TV. 

And then, completely out of the blue, some random person will come walking onto the screen.  Well, I say to myself, this must have something to do with the show I’m watching.  So I divert my attention to the little person (or half person) to see what’s going on.

What’s going on is one of the most confusing and distracting things they’ve come up with yet.

The random person has nothing to do with the current show I’m watching.  It’s an advertisement for a totally different show.  So now I’m trying to remember where I was in the story on my show and try to catch up.  Wait… What?  What did she say?  Great – I just missed the pivotal scene of the whole show.  All the characters will refer to it but never say it, and I’ll be left thinking uncharitable thoughts about the character who invented random people.
Just because we have the technology to do something doesn’t mean we should.

I’m not a multi-tasker.  I admit it.  I used to be, but those days are long past.  I turn a show on because I want to watch that show, not be continually distracted by these people and words and such at the bottom of the screen.

At the very least, we now have the channel logo and Twitter name.  At the worst, we have an actual Twitter feed going across the bottom.  Or a question to be answered on Facebook.

Admittedly, I don’t watch much in the way of sports.  I like to watch Alabama and Auburn football and that’s about it.  I know the basics of football, like there’s 4 quarters, you’ve got 3 tries to make 10 yards, stuff like that.  

But there’s something else you need to watch these games:  extremely good eyesight.  All those little boxes on the bottom and top of the screens are horrible!  They all have numbers in them that are constantly changing.  By the time I’ve located the box I’m wanting, I’ve missed a key play.  Of course, they show you the play about 50 times from about 50 different angles, but, still it would have been nice to see it when it actually happened.

I guess that’s mainly why I watch QVC.  Then all I have to complain about is shipping and handling…

Do you see the snow being plowed?  Well, Mr. Sunshine down there on the lower left has absolutely nothing to do with it!