What I want to know is: Where are all these people going and why are they continually in my way?Alabama State Highway 431 (known locally as “the four lane”), is a treacherous, winding, hilly, thoroughfare that has 18 million traffic lights that you can’t hit all green no matter how fast or how slow you go. And, yes, that’s personal experience speaking.
For reasons unknown to the scientific community, 431 is at its worst starting in Guntersville and going through Boaz all the way to the county line. It’s about 30 miles, if you are lucky enough to drive it without being assaulted by another vehicle.You name it, we’ve got it: rear-ended, t-boned, head on, even sliding under. And they keep putting more traffic lights up, so the odds of getting smacked just go up and up.
I happen to have very good reasons for being on 431. What’s everybody else’s excuse? Because if I’m out there, cars and trucks come at me like I’ve got a target painted on every side of the car. They don’t appear to have any destination, other than scaring the willies out of me as they hurtle this way and that.I’m so thankful I don’t have to teach someone to drive anymore. I wouldn’t know where to start.
Years ago, somebody sold a t-shirt that read “I Survived 431.” Well, it is something to brag about.