David and I have an odd little life. We do things differently than most folks, and here's why: Back in 2006, David was found to have severe congestive heart failure. His doctor told him that he could never work again and to avoid all stress. He didn't know who he was talking to. David is a workaholic in that he always has to be doing something. He's not a sitter like me. David is a doer, I'm a thinker. So together, we have had a long, satisfying marriage by playing off each other's strengths. Then, without any warning at all, David was told he can never work, to avoid all stress, and that his heart could stop at any moment.
David had retired the year before and had three businesses (landscaping, stump removal) and two part-time jobs. He quit all of them that afternoon.
So David stayed at home all day, and I went to my full-time job. It wasn't easy for me to leave him because I fully believed that I would find him dead when I got home. For the first year or so, I would wake up two or three times a night to see if he was breathing.
Men want to take care of their women. Kind of the caveman thing with the male venturing forth to whack an unsuspecting varmint in the head and drag it back to the cave to provide for his family. My caveman wasn't able to do that anymore, and we both struggled to find a new balance in our relationship. We were both hurting, scared and anxious.
I know that without a solid base, our marriage would have been in big trouble during the last 6 years. Our love for each other and our love for God runs deep. Over the past 3½ decades, we had faced many problems and, with the Holy Spirit's leadership, had gotten through each one.
So here we are now, our odd little life changing once again since I have recently retired. No one is the breadwinner, no one has to leave the cave to provide for us. Turns out, we are pretty good at just taking care of each other.
David's heart problems have leveled out, and, if he rests like his body tells him to, we are able to travel with our camper (and three cats, which is another story entirely). He has good days and bad days, like we all do. The medication he is taking has strong side effects that he doesn't have any control over. But obviously God wants him here and wants me to be with him. I'm so glad…